Satire

I can't seem to lose weight! I must have ran for 25 whole minutes yesterday, and I got home only to discover I had lost no weight! I was so upset about it I sat down and started eating ice cream. Ice cream always makes me feel better. I thought losing weight was supposed easy, but I have ran 25 minutes today, and i think I even ran thirty minutes last week. I'm putting in the work, now where are my results. I think i have the solution though. I saw an advertisement for weight loss pills on the television! That is the reason i'm not losing weight, it has to be. If I just order these pills, I will be able to lose weight. I can stop running and eating salads on every single
Sunday. I knew this was supposed to be easy, I was just looking in the wrong area. I'm glad I dont have to be one of these super athletes like my friend Judy. She had to run every day to lose weight, but I guess i'm just a different body type. I work so much harder than her, and finally with these pills, I'll get to see my results!