Swanson. Ron Swanson

If I could be any fictional character, I would be Ron Swanson from the TV show Parks and Rec. Basically, Ron Swanson is a Libertarian who works in local government. He speaks in a very deadpan manner, and is funny despite of the serious way he takes everything.

He believes that Child labor laws are ruining the country.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=endscreen&NR=1&v=ULAfBllREZs

He frowns on the perversion of meat into Vegan products

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=endscreen&v=GXhJPey3i_A&NR=1

He enjoys eating, much like me.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=endscreen&v=DleceyAO34M&NR=1

He is an aggressive and abrasive person, also like me.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SbAA5WN4eHQ&feature=endscreen&NR=1

Some of Ron’s greatest moments right here

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WhDHui1BZYA

In summary, he’s Ron f*****g Swanson

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uBBh7KKD-Hc

A close second would be Jason Bourne. He is the ultimate human weapon. He can take on numerous armed, highly trained opponents, and emerge victorious. Most importantly, he is always several steps ahead of his opposition (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JRLNdcmRcFY). He can predict the movements of his opponents in both the long and short term. And when push comes to shove, he’s the one who comes out on tops. There is no such thing as a no-win situation for him.