Diot v. Diot

Bailiff: All rise.

Judge: You may be seated. We proceed to the case of Diot v. Diot. Now, Mr. Isaac Diot, you are suing your brother, correct?

I. Diot: Yes, that is true.

Judge: Doesn't that seem a bit harsh to sue your own flesh and blood?

I. Diot: Well, your honor, he committed the most unforgivable, horrible offense. I had no choice but to take legal action accordingly.

Judge: Alright what did he do?

I. Diot: He stole my favorite pencil. I'm suing for the $100,000 to cover the expenses of the eraser, my attorney, and pain and suffering as well as inefficiency costs at my workplace due to lack of pencil.

Judge: What do you have to say to this?

Brother: I deny that the pencil in my possession once belonged to him. And I am counter-suing for $150,000 to cover the costs of my attorney as well as the emotional turmoil this case has caused me.

Judge: The plaintiff may now present his evidence.